Whether you're aiming for 5 figure months, trying to find a new career direction, working towards a promotion or dreaming of starting a new business, this one's for you.
I'm diving into that dark ditch of a space between wanting something so badly and actually having it. You know the one I'm talking about - where fear and doubt creeps in and the chance of failing seems all too real.
The Delicate Balance of Wanting
Let's start with something we've all heard growing up - "don't get your hopes up" and "don't count your chickens before they hatch." These phrases have become ingrained in us, teaching us to resist wanting too much.
But what if wanting is actually essential to having?
Hear me out. The more you desire something, the more likely you are to work for it and achieve it. However, it does come with a catch. The heartbreak of not obtaining it when you're super attached can feel far worse than if you didn't care about it in the first place.
Shifting our Focus
For the longest time, we've been told we need to manage our emotional attachment to our goals. But guess what? We've been managing the wrong thing this whole time.
Instead of trying to limit our desire, it makes much more sense to focus on managing our mindset during that challenging phase between wanting and having. It's all about letting go of expectations of how and when it will happen, rather than giving up on achieving it altogether.
You're in the Drivers' Seat
Ready for a truth bomb? Failure only happens the moment you choose to give up. You're in complete control of whether you succeed or fail.
The more I listen to stories of celebs and world class experts (I love a good autobiography and “Diary of a CEO” podcast interview) the more I notice that success is never linear. While all we see is the end product and what appears to be an obvious path to it - there were always rollercoaster dips and uncertainty before success was obtained.
So even when it seemed ludicrous to keep going and by all external measures, they should have given up, they kept hold of their vision with unwavering strength, overcoming those societal pressures.
Finding Your Unique Path
If you’re waiting for it all to be perfectly mapped out before you take your first step - here’s your rude awakening: the map doesn’t exist.
It's easy to fall into the trap of seeking step-by-step instructions to get to your first $1M, 10k Instagram followers or become a world-class expert in your field. But following someone else's cookie cutter methods won't guarantee you the same result.
Your audience is unique, your life experiences are different, and your journey unfolds in a distinct era. Instead of continuously researching and looking for answers outside of yourself, it's time to start looking within.
Allowing Others to Help
In saying that, there are also no extra points for those trying to do it all alone. In fact, investing in networks that open doors for you and seeking guidance from a coach or mentor who can inspire and guide you are absolute game-changers. But please don't follow someone who claims they can hand you all the answers. As we've already established - they can't.
Practices to Navigate Between Wanting and Having
So here’s what to focus on to achieve your revenue goals, that senior position, ditching your 9-5 or finding a more fulfilling career:
Stop researching - it’s great to get inspiration, but the moment it feels like you’re no longer getting closer to an answer, it’s time to stop looking for answers outside of yourself.
Listen to your intuition - this is the inner wisdom that holds so many answers that no one else can tap into but you (a coach can help you hear it, but they can't tell you what your gut is saying)
Work on your quiet confidence - make sure your inner cheerleader is louder than your inner critic
Actually DO something - reading, researching and talking to people feels productive but nothing really gets you closer until you take any form of action.
Stop doing it by yourself - there’s no extra points for those who go it alone. Invest in networks, coaches and mentors who will believe in you when you can't, inspire you when you need it and help you listen to your inner wisdom.
If you're stuck in the space between wanting and having - I'm here for you. Send me a DM with your current “want” and I'll personally guide you on the best steps to achieve it.
With the right mindset, the willingness to take action, and a supportive community by your side, you are destined for abundant success in both life and work.